Psychotherapy Archives

Grief 3 months after a Traumatic Death

Three months after a traumatic death, grief can be particularly intense and prolonged, potentially leading to complicated grief or prolonged grief disorder. Symptoms like intense sorrow, difficulty accepting the death, and difficulty enjoying life may persist or worsen, requiring support and professional intervention if they don’t improve.

Complicated Grief:

This occurs when grief symptoms persist or worsen beyond the initial stages, hindering the healing process. It can manifest as intense pain, difficulty accepting the loss, and a persistent focus on the deceased.

Prolonged Grief Disorder:

This is a formal diagnosis characterized by persistent and intense grief symptoms that interfere with daily life, including difficulty accepting the death, marked sense of disbelief, and avoidance of reminders of the deceased.

Signs and Symptoms:

Beyond intense sorrow, individuals experiencing trauma-related grief may also experience:

- Difficulty accepting the death
- Persistent longing for the deceased
- Numbness or detachment
- Bitterness or anger
- Feeling life holds no meaning
- Lack of trust in others
- Inability to enjoy life
- Physical symptoms like fatigue, changes in sleep or appetite

Factors Influencing Grief:

Traumatic deaths, like those involving violence or sudden accidents, can intensify grief, making it more challenging to cope. Additionally, factors like social support, cultural background, and pre-existing mental health conditions can also impact the grieving process.

Seeking Support:

It’s crucial to seek professional help if grief symptoms persist or worsen, or if they interfere with daily life. Therapists can provide support and guidance in navigating the grieving process, including techniques for managing intense emotions and developing coping strategies.

I am a Specialist Bereavement and Grief Counsellor in Fleet, Hampshire working in person and online counselling and offer a safe, supportive space for clients experiencing grief and loss through bereavement.

Contact me to book an initial session and I will support you through this difficult time.

For additional links please visit this page https://www.carolineellisoncounselling.co.uk/grief-counsellor/ to find a comprehensive list of charities who may be able to support you.

Collated by your local counsellor in Fleet, Caroline at Caroline Ellison Counselling.

Seasonal Affected Disorder and how to manage it

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a type of depression which is can be experienced during the shorter days which are in the Autumn and Winter months. The days have less natural sunlight which is why we refer to them as being shorter.

Why do shorter days evoke SAD?

As the days are shorter we experience changes in light exposure. Which is believed to disrupt the body’s internal clock and lead to imbalances in certain neurotransmitters, such as serotonin and melatonin. SAD is more common here in the UK due to the long, dark winters.

What are the symptoms of SAD?

The symptoms of SAD can vary in severity but often include:

Persistent low mood or sadness.
Fatigue and low energy.
Difficulty concentrating.
Changes in appetite, often with cravings for carbohydrate-rich foods.
Oversleeping or difficulty sleeping.
Weight gain.

How to support SAD symptoms

If you suspect that you or someone you know is experiencing SAD, here are some strategies to help support and manage it:

Light Therapy: Light therapy, or phototherapy, is a common treatment for SAD.. Use a light therapy box that emits bright light (10,000 lux) to simulate natural sunlight. Aim for 20-30 minutes each morning. These special lights can help alleviate symptoms.
Outdoor Exposure: Try to spend more time outdoors during daylight hours, even on overcast days. Take walks, go for a run, or engage in other outdoor activities to increase your exposure to natural light. It is recommended that we spend at least 20 minutes a day outside to support our mental health.
Diet and Exercise: Maintain a healthy diet and regular exercise routine. Eating well and staying physically active can help boost your mood and energy levels. If possible, aim for at least 30 minutes of physical activity most days of the week.
Limit Alcohol and Caffeine: Reducing intake can help stabilize mood and energy levels.
Supplements: Some people find relief from SAD symptoms by taking vitamin D supplements, due to the connection between vitamin D deficiency and SAD.
Counselling and Psychotherapy: Talking with a counsellor can be effective in supporting and managing SAD. It can help individuals develop coping strategies and address negative thought patterns.
Medication: In some cases, a doctor may prescribe antidepressant medication to help manage SAD symptoms. This is usually considered when other treatments are not effective.
Mindfulness and Stress Reduction: Practicing relaxation techniques, meditation and mindfulness can help reduce stress and improve your overall mood.
Maintain a Routine: Stick to a regular schedule to help regulate your body’s internal clock. This includes consistent wake and sleep times.
Seek Professional Help: If your symptoms are severe or persistent, it is important to consult a mental health professional or a general practitioner (GP) who can help determine the most appropriate treatment plan for you.
Supportive Social Network: Talk to friends and family about how you are feeling. Their support can be invaluable during this time.

SAD is real and treatable

Remember that SAD is a real and treatable condition and seeking professional help is an important step if you or someone you know is struggling with it. Implementing these strategies can help manage symptoms and improve quality of life during the shorter days. If you’re struggling, it’s always a good idea to seek professional advice. You can start by consulting your GP or a mental health specialist to discuss your symptoms and explore treatment options tailored to your specific needs.

For individual counselling I am here for you. Contact me to book an initial session and I will support you.

If you are in crisis and want immediate support please call the Samaritans who offer a free 24 hour helpline – Phone: 116 123 – Website: www.samaritans.org

Helpful Contacts

Anxiety UK – can provide advice and support for people living with anxiety, which may be related to SAD.
Helpline: 03444 775 774
Text service: 07537 416 905
Website: https://www.anxietyuk.org.uk

CALM – The Campaign Against Living Miserably CALM is another organisation that provides listening services, information, and support for anyone who needs to talk, including a web chat service.
Telephone: 0800 58 58 58
Website: https://www.thecalmzone.net

Depression UK – is a self-help organisation made up of individuals and local groups that can provide support and information related to depression, which is a common symptom of SAD.
Website: https://www.depressionuk.org

Rethink – Rethink Mental Illness provides support and information for anyone affected by mental health problems, including local support groups.
Telephone: 0808 801 0525
Website: https://rethink.org

Written by your local counsellor in Fleet, Caroline at Caroline Ellison Counselling – this is my experience and these are my opinions. Carpe Diem.

Vulnerability is Nectar for Narcissists

Unveiling the Manipulative Dance

Vulnerability, often regarded as a human quality that fosters connection and empathy, can paradoxically become a breeding ground for narcissistic individuals to exploit and manipulate. The interplay between vulnerability and narcissism is a complex dance, where the vulnerable often find themselves unwittingly ensnared in the web of self-serving individuals. In this article, we explore how vulnerability acts as nectar for narcissists, drawing them in with the promise of empathy only to be used as pawns in their self-centred games.

What is Vulnerability?

Vulnerability is an inherent part of the human experience, which signifys openness, emotional transparency and the willingness to expose oneself to the potential for harm or rejection. It is a crucial aspect of genuine human connections, allowing individuals to forge bonds based on shared experiences, emotions and trust. However, when vulnerability encounters a narcissistic force, the dynamics take a dark turn.

The Narcissistic Persona

Narcissists, characterised by an inflated sense of self-importance, a constant need for admiration and a lack of empathy, often seek out vulnerabilities in others to serve their own agenda which is why vulnerability is nectar for narcissist. Their charismatic and charming facade can be particularly alluring to those who are susceptible to emotional openness, creating a perfect storm for manipulation.

The Manipulative Dance

Narcissists are adept at identifying and exploiting vulnerabilities in others. They employ a variety of tactics to gain control and feed their insatiable need for attention and validation. One such tactic is the love bombing phase, where the narcissist showers their target with excessive praise, attention and affection. This creates a false sense of security and emotional connection, leading the vulnerable individual to lower their guard.

As the relationship progresses, the narcissist gradually exploits the vulnerabilities they have identified. They may undermine the target’s self-esteem, gaslight them into questioning their reality, or exploit their emotional wounds for personal gain. The vulnerable individual, initially drawn in by the apparent empathy and understanding, becomes entangled in a toxic web of manipulation.

The Cycle of Exploitation

Narcissists thrive on the emotional energy of their victims. The more vulnerable an individual is, the more susceptible they become to the narcissist’s tactics. This cycle of exploitation often leads to a power dynamic where the narcissist maintains control while the vulnerable party is left emotionally drained and confused and in many cases isolated from their friends and families.

Breaking Free

Recognising the toxic dance between vulnerability and narcissism is the first step toward breaking free from the manipulative grip. Building resilience, setting boundaries, and cultivating self-awareness are essential tools for individuals to protect themselves from falling prey to narcissistic manipulation.

Conclusion

While vulnerability is a genuine and valuable aspect of the human experience, it is crucial to be aware of the potential dangers when it encounters narcissistic individuals. Understanding the manipulative dance that ensues allows individuals to navigate relationships more cautiously and protect themselves from falling victim to the insidious tactics of narcissists. By fostering a culture of awareness and resilience, society can mitigate the impact of narcissistic exploitation and promote healthier, more authentic connections.

For individual support I am here for you. Contact me to book an initial session and I will support you.

This blog was collated from internet sources and your local counsellor in Fleet, Caroline at Caroline Ellison Counselling – this is my experience and these are my opinions. Carpe Diem.