Tag: support

How to stay focused with Adult ADHD

How to stay focused with adult ADHD

Staying focused with adult ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) can be challenging, but there are strategies and techniques that can help you manage your symptoms and improve your ability to concentrate. However, it is important to remember that what works for one person may not work for another, so you may need to experiment with different strategies to find what works best for you.

ADHD staying Focused Tips

Here are some tips to help you stay focused with adult ADHD:

  • Seek Professional Help: First and foremost, consider working with a healthcare professional, such as a psychiatrist or therapist, who specialises in ADHD. They can provide you with a proper diagnosis, treatment options (which may include medication) and guidance on managing your symptoms.

  • Medication: ADHD medications, such as stimulants or non-stimulants, can be highly effective in improving focus and concentration. Consult with a healthcare professional to determine if medication is a suitable option for you.

  • Create a Structured Routine: Establishing a daily routine can help you stay on track and minimize distractions. Set specific times for work, meals, exercise and relaxation and stick to this schedule as closely as possible.

  • Use Task Lists and Planners: Write down your tasks and prioritise them. Breaking tasks into smaller, manageable steps can make them feel less overwhelming. Digital or physical planners, to-do lists and calendar apps can help you keep track of your responsibilities.

  • Eliminate Distractions: Identify common distractions in your environment and take steps to minimize them. This may include turning off notifications on your phone, using website blockers or creating a dedicated workspace that is free from distractions.

  • Time Management Techniques: Techniques like the Pomodoro Technique (working in short, focused bursts with breaks in between) or time blocking can be helpful in managing your time effectively.

  • Set Clear Goals: Define clear and achievable goals for your tasks. Knowing the purpose and expected outcome of a task can help you stay motivated and focused.

  • Stay Organized: Keep your physical and digital spaces organized. Use labels, folders, and color-coding to make it easier to find what you need and reduce clutter.

  • Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness meditation and deep breathing exercises can improve your ability to stay present and focused. Regular practice can also help manage stress, which can exacerbate ADHD symptoms.

  • Exercise and Diet: Regular physical activity and a balanced diet can have a positive impact on your overall well-being and focus. Aim for regular exercise and consider consulting a nutritionist for dietary guidance.

  • Sleep: Prioritise good sleep hygiene to ensure you are well rested. A consistent sleep schedule and a comfortable sleep environment can make a big difference in your ability to focus.

  • Seek Support: Share your challenges and goals with friends, family members or a support group. They can offer encouragement, accountability and understanding.

  • Learn About ADHD: Educate yourself about ADHD to better understand your condition. Knowledge about your symptoms and how they affect you can empower you to make informed choices and develop effective strategies.

Be Kind to yourself

Remember that managing adult ADHD is an ongoing process and it is okay to seek help and make changes as you need them. Be kind and patient with yourself and celebrate all your successes big and small. With the right techniques, strategies and support, you can improve your ability to stay focused with your adult ADHD mind.

Additional Support

There is a lot of support out there. In my opinion this podcast by Huberman is really interesting – ADHD & How Anyone Can Improve Their Focus | Huberman Lab Podcast #37

Other support:

For individual support I am here for you. Contact me to book an initial session and I will support you.

Written by your local counsellor in Fleet, Caroline at Caroline Ellison Counselling – this is my experience and these are my opinions. Carpe Diem.

Caring and Help

Caring and ‘Help’

It is dark and as the sun slowly starts to rise, the song thrush sings from the distance. I am at my Dads’ house. Last night he called with the first middle of the night ‘help’. He was having heart issues which he felt were like a heart attack and he sounded scared. “I need some help with this” he stated as the Doctor in him rationalised what might be happening. I packed a bag, kissed my husband and drove 2 hours to be with him. When I arrived the Ambulance was just leaving with Dad not in it. He was well enough to not go to hospital but needed to see his GP the next day. As a non medic I questioned this but was assured by the amazing Ambulance crew that he was OK, for now. [Since writing this he has been checked by a Cardiologist and is OK still, for now]

Dad’s Fragility

This is the first time Dad has shared his fragility with me. He is 83 and has been caring for Mum for the last 10 years, she has Dementia. He is exhausted! It is so hard for anyone caring for a loved one as they are on call 24 hours a day and it is relentless. The despair of the future sits in the living grief and the isolation of their day to day demands often leaves carers lonely with a loss of their own joi de vive. The only true respite will come when the one they love dies and that is the not the respite they look forward to or want!

Caring for his Wife

Sitting in the sun room next to my incognisant Mum, I reflect on the stark reality of Dad’s life as he cares for Mum 24/7. I look at Mum and wonder if she even knows I am in the room, she rarely opens her eyes now and we do wonder how much vision is left behind what were once vibrant piercing blue eyes. Dad potters around the kitchen making protein smoothies with fresh fruit he bought from the shop this morning with his daily paper. He spoon feeds his wife so gently and calmly, wipes her face and makes sure she is still sitting upright. She is propped up on both sides as her muscles have weakened so much that she is no longer able to sit up without the support. It is so heartening and so utterly sad to see!! Dementia is a long, slow, cruel illness which affects not just the one with it but all those around. My Dad has lost his wife but he has also lost his freedom to live out their retirement together. He is isolated in his care giving and love to Mum. He never complains and I do wonder how much of the sadness I feel he hides beneath the veneer of his smile. I doubt I will ever know as Dad is a stoic and proud man.

Carers are the unsung heroes

Caring for a loved one is relentless, often thankless and usually exhausting. I have witnessed the way caring can take all the energy and light out of Dad and others I have worked with through counselling. Carers are the unsung heroes, the ones who keep on going because they have to, the ones who get forgotten in the midst of the illness of the one they are caring for.

Support for Carers

If you visit a loved one who is ill and being cared for please make time for the carer as it will be them who need your support, empathy, sympathy, time and conversation so much more I expect than the one they are caring for. Ask the carer if they are OK, if they want some respite, if there is anything you can do which will be of support for them. If you can spare a few hours, ask them if they want to go out and be free of their caring for a few hours whilst you cover for them. It is the little offerings which make a big difference to carers. Don’t lose sight of their needs in the fog of the illness of the one they are caring for. Also, in my experience, carers will be the last ones to ask for help but the first ones who need it to be offered!!

Massive Thank you

To finish this blog I want to say a massive thank you to Dad and all the wonderful people who go out of their way every day to make the lives of others better, richer, more comfortable and enable the ones who they care for to be OK for another day. They literally could not do it without you.

Take time when you can to take care of you too.

Written by your local counsellor in Fleet, Caroline at Caroline Ellison Counselling – this is my experience and these are my opinions. Carpe Diem.

Alzheimer’s and Dementia support

If you are an Alzheimer’s and Dementia carer, you are not alone, there are many people who are here to support you. There are helplines and support groups who will offer support, below are some of those who can offer expert advice. I specialise in Counselling for Carers and counselling for Alzheimer’s and Dementia and am here to support you.

After a diagnosis of dementia: next steps – This checklist has been written by dementia specialist Admiral Nurses, to help in the early days after you or your family member has received a diagnosis of dementia.
Website: Steps to take after diagnosis of Dementia

Alzheimer’s Society
Provides information on dementia, including factsheets and helplines.
Phone: 0333 150 3456 (Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm and 10am to 4pm on weekends).
Website: www.alzheimers.org.uk

Talking Point, on-line dementia and their carers: foum.alzheimers.org.uk  

Alzheimer’s Research UK
The leading dementia and Alzheimer’s disease research charity.
Phone: 0300 111 55555
Website: https://www.alzheimersresearchuk.org/

Alzheimer’s Association
Lots of information on their site with links. They strives to improve quality of life for those facing Alzheimer’s disease and other dementias.
Website: https://www.alz.org/uk/dementia-alzheimers-uk.asp

Alzheimer Café UK
Website UK: http://www.alzheimercafe.co.uk/
Website Farnborough: http://www.alzheimercafe.co.uk/Farnborough.htm

Carer’s allowance
If you’re caring for someone with dementia, you may be entitled to certain benefits. This page will tell you if you’re entitled to Carer’s allowance: https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/legal-financial/carers-allowance

Carer Support and Dementia Advice Service for Hampshire 
Provides advice, information and support to all carers aged 18 and above who provide care for an adult. The service also supports people with dementia and memory problems and is available throughout Hampshire.
Phone: 01264 332297
Email: enquiries@andovermind.org.uk

Care Choices
Committed to helping people who need information on social care and support. Find the Care Home or Care Solution that’s best for you – get information, guidance and reviews. Phone: 01223 207770 Website: https://www.carechoices.co.uk/

Dementia Guidance
An independent dementia guide intended to provide a guide to free services available throughout the UK to people with dementia and their families.
https://www.dementiaguidance.co.uk

Dementia Friendly Hampshire
An independent charity, working to make Hampshire a county where people affected by dementia can live a good life.
Phone: 07388 668332
Email: jane.ward@dementiafriendlyhampshire.org.uk
https://dementiafriendlyhampshire.org.uk/

Dementia Friendly Hampshire – Advice and Information
This is a helpful list of things people who have dementia need to consider having in place.
Website: https://dementiafriendlyhampshire.org.uk/advice-and-info/

Dementia Talking Point – Alzheimer’s UK online community. Have you or someone you know been diagnosed with dementia? Join Dementia Talking Point to share experiences with other people affected by dementia.
Website: https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/dementia-talking-point-our-online-community

Find a Dementia Café or dementia service near you
Dementia Cafés offer a place to socialise, learn more about dementia and local services, and enjoy something new each session. Follow this link to find your local Café:
Website: https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/your-support-services/dementia-cafes

Alzheimer’s Drug Discovery Foundation
Website: https://www.alzdiscovery.org/

Brunel Care
Local Charity caring for older people across Bristol, South Gloucestershire, North Somerset and Somerset.
Phone: 0117 914 4200
Website: https://www.brunelcare.org.uk/

DEEP
DEEP stands for the Dementia Engagement and Empowerment Project – it is the UK network of dementia voices. DEEP consists of around 100 groups of people with dementia – groups that want to change things.
Contact Rachel Niblock – UK Coordinator for DEEP network.
Email: niblock@myid.org.uk
Phone: 07720 538851
Website: https://www.dementiavoices.org.uk/

Dementia Action Alliance
Support national and local for dementia support
Website: https://www.dementiaaction.org.uk/ / https://nationaldementiaaction.org.uk/

Dementia Adventure
Charity supporting people with dementia to get outdoors, connect with nature, themselves and their community, and retain a sense of adventure in their lives.
Phone: 01245 237548
Email: info@dementiaadventure.co.uk
Website: http://www.dementiaadventure.com/

Dementia Connect Helpline
Phone: 0333 150 3456
Wales and West Midlands

Dementia UK
Telephone or email advice and support for family carers, people with dementia and professionals provided by experienced Admiral nurses.
Phone: 0800 888 6678
Website: www.dementiauk.org

Royal Airforces Dementia Support
Phone: 0800 018 2361
Email: dementia@rafa.org.uk
Website: https://dementia.rafa.org.uk/

NHS Information
An overview of Alzheimer’s disease. Signs and symptoms of Alzheimer’ disease
Website: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/alzheimers-disease/

Play List for Life
Charity founded by Sally Magnusson after death of her mother who had dementia. Music for everyone living with dementia which can make it easier and happier
Phone: 0141 404 0683
Email: info@playlistforlife.org.uk
Website: https://www.playlistforlife.org.uk/

The Wide Spectrum
Dementia education resources
Website: http://www.thewidespectrum.co.uk/default.htm

Young Dementia UK
Support for those with early onset dementia. Young Dementia UK have teamed up with Dementia UK.
Dementia Helpline UK: 0800 888 6678
Website: https://www.youngdementiauk.org/

Counselling Directory – https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/dementia.html

This list is by no means comprehensive so if you know of other support available I will be very grateful if you will let me know so that I can add them to the list for others to find. Email me please. carolineellisoncounselling@gmail.com

What is Shame?

What is Shame?

“I am bad. The focus is on self, not behaviour. The result is feeling flawed and unworthy of love, belonging and connection. Shame is not a driver of positive change.” – Atlas of the Heart – Brene Brown.

Shame is systemic, we feel it in our whole body. Shame is often delivered from our primary carer from infancy to teach us a moral code. It can be constructive, supportive and guiding when used for good. However, Continue reading “What is Shame?”

What is Emotional Intensity Disorder?

What is Emotional Intensity Disorder?

Emotional Intensity Disorder (EID) is sometimes known as:

  • Emotional Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD) or
  • Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).

Emotional Intensity Disorder is a mental health personality disorder that affects the regulation of emotions. Emotional dysregulation is when a person experiences intense emotions that they are unable to manage in constructive ways. Continue reading “What is Emotional Intensity Disorder?”

Mother’s Day without Mum

Mother’s Day without Mum!

My Mum has gone in mind but is still with us in body and soul! Today I called my Dad to say

“Happy Mother’s Day”

It left me feeling empty when I put the phone down and I came to my cabin to write this whilst it was still clear in my head and heavy in my heart. Continue reading “Mother’s Day without Mum”