What is Anger?
Anger is one of our core emotions. Emotions are complex feelings we experience mentally, physically and behaviourally:
- Mentally we experience our emotions and feelings.
- Physically we feel them through awareness, tension and feelings in our body from the pit of our stomach to the tips of our fingers.
- Behaviourally we experience our feelings and emotions as an impulse to act.
What does Anger feel like?
Anger is a strong feeling of displeasure and antagonism. When anger rises you may feel fury, indignation, rage, sadness, fear or a sense of things being unjust. Anger is one of the emotions we are usually most afraid of because our experience of anger may have been a negative one or has lead to injury to a relationship or person. Anger may cause some people to be aggressive and for others they may hide their anger and take it out on themselves! Anger may also be used as a defence mechanism to protect them from allowing others to get close to them.
What Anger maybe concealing
Anger can be triggered by people, places or situations. Each of us have our own unique anger triggers. These triggers however, may be concealing other emotions which are behind the anger such as:
Have you ever noticed that when you are tired or overwhelmed you feel anger more often?
This is likely to be caused by your coping mechanism being overwhelmed which means you may ‘flip your lid’ or become angry more quickly.
What triggers Anger?
Anger can be used as it is intended to protect ourselves from an unjust situation, however anger, it’s triggers and the emotions behind it are a powerful force which can take over and affect our daily life. It is not always easy to recognise that anger is the reason you are behaving differently. Anger is not always represented through ‘rage’!
Anger Management
If anger is a driving emotion which affects your life and you want understand your triggers and where they come from, talking with a counsellor can help. Working with a counsellor will be a safe, confidential place to learn coping strategies to manage anger enabling you to:
Notice when you are triggered and how to stay calm through breathing, grounding and other techniques.
Listen to your body so you are aware when you are triggered and you are in control of your emotions and not your emotions in control of you.
Recognise that you are upset and that caring for yourself first is OK.
Show Compassion to yourself and do not listen to your judging or critical thoughts.
Identify what you need to feel better and remind yourself that feelings are not facts.
Counselling for Anger
I have experience working with anger and I am here to support you. Please get in touch for a free initial counselling session. Remember feelings are not facts and separating how you are feeling from the actual facts of what is going on can help you take effective action to work through your anger.
Shared by your local counsellor in Fleet, Caroline at Caroline Ellison Counselling – this is my experience and these are my opinions. Carpe Diem.