What is Counselling?
Talking in a safe, confidential space with a professional who will listen without judgement.
Counselling provides an opportunity for you to talk about your concerns in a confidential and safe environment. By talking through your concerns, you will deepen your understanding of what is happening and develop alternate ways of thinking, feeling and behaving. My goal as an integrative therapist is to help you develop these skills, and to uncover your unique and innate abilities to successfully manage your emotions, relationships and concerns.
What to expect from Counselling
Your experience within counselling will be unique to you, however here are some ideas of what to expect from counselling.
- Coming into a space where you build a relationship of trust with your counsellor and as your therapeutic relationship builds you are able to look at your life, your self and understand who you are.
- Exploring your present life and reflecting on your past.
- Learning how you process emotions, respond to others and receive others emotions and processes.
We are all unique individuals jostling our lives with others, family, friends, work and so much more. Sometimes there is so much going on externally that we stop looking internally. Sometimes our ability to manage emotions, cope with our feelings, understand our feelings or see the world becomes blurred through life experiences from childhood to today.
What does Counselling support?
- A myriad of things you experience all at once or just the one time.
- How you are feeling in the moment right now but understanding how you learnt to feel that way.
- Reframing your current life and seeing it in a different frame which is enlightening, refreshing and invigorating.
- Learning who you are so you are able to be a better version than the one you have been for ‘all this time’.
- How to be stronger and more able to cope with the trials of your life.
- Recognising loss and grief not just from a recent bereavement necessarily but from experiences in your life which have been left unprocessed.
- Looking at those moments in your childhood which have moulded your future.
- Seeing the way you see yourself may not be through your own eyes, it may for some still be through your parent’s eyes or significant others eyes.
Not Good Enough
If you think you are ‘not good enough’ it is about understanding where the roots of this belief stems from and realising that you ‘are good enough’.
It is about looking in the mirror and seeing the reflection of your authentic self clearly without any fog, wall or barrier preventing you from being your authentic self.
It is about clarity, building self-esteem, becoming self-aware and being able to find your ‘happy place’ again.
It is some of these things or just one or it may be something completely different, but counselling is talking therapy and like a river after a storm it may flow with vigour in many directions but will eventually slow to a meandering stream of calm which you will love and recognise as ‘me, myself and I’.
Find your stream, find who you are and see that you are ‘good enough’ and that your authentic self is in there with you.
What is Counselling for a Carer?
Counselling for a carer is a space where you can be honest about your feelings without judgement, reprisal or consequence. Caring for a loved one or as a carer may lead to feelings of anxiety, depression, stress, grief and can leave you feeling isolated.
Guilt and Shame
You may push down emotions day after day after day and believe that you are caring for the person you love because ‘you love them’ and it is ‘the right thing to do’. I do not doubt that this is true of many but you may find that those moments of frustration, sadness, exhaustion, loneliness, despair, loss and grief become overwhelming. If you have nowhere for the feelings to go, they can become a toxic cocktail which may turn into anger, resentment, irritation, overwhelm and you may find your ability to care with compassion becomes harder and harder. Then the feelings of guilt and shame wash over you like a shadow of darkness.
Unpack your Emotions
Counselling is a space where you can unpack your emotions, be honest and open about them. Like a pressure cooker, you can take off the lid and let them out. You can talk about your hopes and fears, you can share your feelings of loss as the person you are caring for has been changed by their illness. You can sit with your feelings of shame and guilt and process them.
Talking with a counsellor offers a cocoon, a space to vent, a sounding board, a space where it is safe to honestly sit with your emotions, cry, shout, talk, whatever you need to see you through. I will sit with you, listen and offer you a mental ‘first aid kit’ to support you. You are not alone I am here for you.
Remember your feelings do not own you, you own your feelings! Find a way to be OK with how you feel and understand why you feel the way you do, when you do.
If you are looking for a counsellor to support you, get in touch and book your initial consultation.